One Way

One smile of joy
One touch of care
One hand to hold
and one passionate embrace...
can make a lover's day.

One instant of misunderstanding
One hint of a lie
One moment of suffocation
and one level of expectation...
can make you throw it all away.

One puff of smoke
One peg of scotch
One mindless night
and one new face...
can be an easy way.

But...
One look of hope
One tear drop of sorrow
One kiss of love
and one thought of you...
can make me stay.
It has to be this One and only Way.

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In The Shadows...

After some time Katherine didn't even feel any pity. All she had were dark emotions. 

He wasn’t fair to her. Now the aura of hatred was all around her, just that and nothing else.
Yes it was passion, but it was dark.
Her heart knew that he meant something to her.
But her mind said that she meant nothing to him.
The constant fight between her heart and her mind left her exhausted.

She lay there in the dark watching the shadows.
They have a world of their own, where there is nothing except shadows.
Everything is dark. Everything is black.
There’s no one to judge. There’s nothing to judge.
The sorrow is black. The joy is black too.
Ugliness is black. The beauty is black too.

May be that’s the world they belonged to now.
Because there was no black and white here, it was just black.
The only place where her heart and mind were not at conflict…
Because like him, she was dark too.

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From Darkness to Light...

That day was a weird, tiring day. Every moment seemed to be forced upon me.

Finally on the bus ride from Bandra to back home I closed my eyes.

As soon as my eye lids met each other I realized something peculiar... I couldn't see any color.

The asymmetrical or sometimes psychedelic shapes that form when u shut your eyes, and which I enjoy a lot, weren't there!

I squeezed my eyes shut even harder and I tried to imagine colors,

I thought that would help… but NO.. It was pitch black.

Darkness looming all around…

I opened my eyes, quite shocked!!

I rushed home found my box of water colors and brushes shoved somewhere deep in the closet...

I had to paint... and yes I did.
let the brush take a mind of its own and rest is the Picture below!

                                                     I brought colors back in my life. :)

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Moments & Smiles...

This has been my dream. Sitting in Timbuctoo facing the hills whilst it's raining during the twilight.

The rain sprinkles kissing my face. All this happened on that evening of August. 

And what better than a Cocktail that keeps you warm and in good 'Spirits' ;)

Sharing it with the one you love.

Cherry on the icing, or lemme say on the drink, being the tiny bit of shopping before coming to this heaven.

Yes, that would be my new Jute Bag.

The happy faces of friends filling in, some old and some new.

 Long conversations with hearty laughter to add more spicy to this very yummy Mirchi Kebab.

An evening which will remain with me for long.

It was right out of my dream.

They rightly say real joy is found in the small things! 

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To Judge or not to judge?

I have this weird friendship with, let’s call him T, this guy T! We are together since years and know everything about each other. But we have such difference of opinions that we can’t stand each other for more than 3 hours! And our latest topic of conflict was very surprisingly Poonam Pandey!

The other day he was a mixture of lot of emotions at a time: Shock, Excitement and Disgust!
And I was disgusted at how his brain worked.
His friend had shown him the very notorious tweets of Poonam Pandey. It was made up of half nude pictures and suggestive comments, yes we all know about it.

They both had a great time going through all the tweets.
But then T says, ’who would do such things. She is such a despo!’
I told him she is desperate for attention from the industry and this is how she plans to do it.
 Her target audience is people like you!

T had an expression of intense disgust & for what?
For the very pictures he had savored every bit of which. This itself gave him no right to judge her.
I am not saying what Poonam Pandey does is right or wrong! I don’t give a shit about it.

But when T behaved like sucha hypocrite I felt like telling him that she has found a way to struggle and survive in this glam industry, of which he does doesn’t even have the inkling of.
And if he enjoys what Poonam’s treat for everyone is, he better shut the fuck up and stop judging her.

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Ice Breaker or a Relationship Breaker?

That coffee shop always felt magical to her. It was full of positivity and sunshine. And why wouldn’t it be? One whole side was of transparent glass with few bright abstracts painted on it. The other walls were hot pink and purple.

That day all of them sat there as always on the black couch with deep purple and hot pink cushions. She was a little distracted. Her eyes and mind kept wandering straight out of those glass walls.

He was walking towards that coffee place. Yes a little nervous he was… the good nervous. He had ventured out after grueling months of engineering studies. He traversed the glass wall to reach the door.

She was absent mindedly looking at him walk to the door with head bowed down a little, he pushed that door with his right hand and she couldn’t help but notice that he was quite well built. Her absent mindedness was so silly that she hadn’t realized that he was walking towards their table till her friend got up and hugged him. She was back to her senses and lost her senses at the same time!

He pulled a chair and was seated diagonally opposite to her. Her friend introduced him to everyone and now it was her turn. He said,” Ruzha, this is Ray, Ray… Ruzha” And it seemed funny why did she just giggle in her mind. Why had her girly instincts taken over her sane mind?

He sipped onto honey golden colored Irish coffee surprisingly after cooling it completely.
He had felt it too; yes felt something hit him hard. Well none of them had realized then that cupid was at work.

Ray a shy kinda guy sat there sipping on his hot turned cold Irish coffee and listening intently to the friendly silly conversations that went on.

She couldn’t resist his silence. She had to make him talk! She teased him, she joked with him, and she even sided with him at times. It was his turn to break the ice.
The intention was right, the move was right or wrong could never be judged. He saw a book in her hand. He felt the need to speak... to seek!

Said he,” I too read this author. And have read quite a few of his works?”
Excited Ruzha asked, “How do you find this book of his?” Not every one of Ruzha’s friends was such crazy readers and he saying these words was like poetry to her ears.

Ice was broken; the conversation went from that coffee table to online chats, from texts to phone conversations. Ice breaker as it was could have turned into a relationship breaker as the chain of his reading escapades continued. Ruzha kept on getting impressed and Ray loved the way he felt.....

But what happens when Ruzha finds out about the lies after 6 months into the relationship?

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Noise & Peace...

They say we live in a free world.
But employed people would know that ain't true.
Weekends, or for some just Sundays, are the days when they are free.

And even on Sunday evenings there's no peace to be found.
What with all the malls bustling with adults, kids, teenagers & people of every age, size n shape!
Various activities taking place in every corner.
This can be really Traumatic. :p

But somehow my friend and I have found a way to zone out all the noise.
Last evening amidst  all the hubbub, we sat there under the coconut tree with comfortable silence between us and also a few light conversations.
And staring at this serene pearl white moon peeping from the dark clouds.
That is all the nature that we can experience in this city life.
But during such moments you realize there's lot more to life than just reaching work on time, battling through the traffic or commenting on Facebook.
Such are the moments that give you true joy and inner peace.

Yesterday, I found mine! :)

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What to do?

Everything is changed...
I might weep for some time
but soon I may not care.
Rains will wash away the stains.

Any signs of the feelings that I had..
No they won't remain.
To find them again..
am sure you will try real bad,
Who knows where they might be..
Difficult you will find to recreate
Yeah, you will see.

Your remorse might not really help...
and I am not to be blamed
when I say...
Things are changing it's true...
But baby now what to do?

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Mad Over Donuts!!!

However surprising it may sound I had never tasted Doughnuts until this woman's day!

Why?? It will be cause when I looked at them I had a feeling that they gonna be too sugary and sweet and soft fluffy melting in ur mouth stuff!

But I saw this episode in Sex and the City where Miranda can’t resist her love for Doughnuts! Glazed Doughnuts!! The Doughnuts that they showed looked hot, shiny and yummy…ng in your mouth sweet thing! And me not having a sweet tooth, Doughnuts didn't attract me then.

That episode did tempt me and I decided I need to try one.

On woman’s day I had been to CCD with Mr. Sun and I said I would try a donut today. He made a face as soon as he heard my suggestion. He shared the same sentiments that I had about Doughnuts before. I didn’t wanna argue so I just let it go… But those round little brown things where still hovering in the back of my mind.

As we were leaving we heard this small thing going on especially for Woman’s Day. They had asked to name six fruits which are Red. Ok, I knew I could do that. I went, I named and I won!!!
What did I win??? A free choco Doughnuts!!
So was it a coincidence… Nah it was a do-incidence!

And oh my oh my… It was delicious… Perfect levels of sweetness and softness! Just the way I prefer.

And that evening onwards I had gone MAD OVER DONUTS!!!

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Its not a habit... Its addiction!

My life, I feel is incomplete without some fragment of fiction to dwell in...

I constantly need Fantasy stuff to run away from my quite a good life.. I call it REALITY!

Its not a habit... Its addiction!!!

Its stretching my horizons...

Living in impossible..

Shedding tears over love..

The intensities of the characters...

Analyzing human behavior...

Experiencing the clichéd word... "Magical"...

Knowing that somethings I am capable of... but would never risk to do that in real life...

Feeling the mystery...

Deep eyes...

Pure passions...

Its like living the in world you always dream of...

Don't let me go... don't let me go.. don't let me gooooo...

Picture you are the queen of everything as far as the eye can see..

I will be your guardian, when all is crumbling...

Steady your hand...

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Escape

I looked around...

but peace could not be found.

This dizzy trance refrain to fade...

Somewhere with a jolt I awake.

the air that kissed the cement and stone...

failed to refresh my single bone.

Loneliness crept over me..

It stabbed me like a cold knife.

The feelings were such a haze..

thoughts kept going around in a maze.

The sea is far away..

but still I can hear its call..

Please tell me a way to escape this all.

The sunsets there..

are less melancholy than my mornings here.

One day I might leave everything behind..

to walk once again on that silvery sand.

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Inspiration called 'Nagesh Kukunoor'

You are inspired not by the self-help books...

You are motivated not by some quoted sayings...

...But by a person who's been there and done that.

...Who shares with you his experiences and insights.

We had a guest lecture by a well-known film-maker-'Nagesh Kukunoor'.

Yes, most probably this whole thing was a barter for the promotion of his new movie,

but that doesn't mean that the experience wasn't nurturing.

I really don't know about others,

but as he talked and shared...

I had traveled different worlds in my mind.

I could relate to his experiences... no not in actual way.

I have never been to a 'full blown Bollywood Set', as he puts it, but

the way he described everything...

I kinda created vivid pictures in my mind.

And what Nagesh Kukunoor tried to plant in us was 'HOPE'!!!

It made me think if he could do it, anyone else could.

And so can I!

Its all about following your passion... then whatever they might be.

He did what he believed in.

As he told us, he believed in the goodness of real locations over studio sets...

He went ahead and had his shoot on-location!

He believed in his movies... Went ahead and made them!

He made those movies for himself first and then for the audience...

Inspiring us to believe in Ourselves!

Sometimes such a push is needed...

Film promotion or for real.. who cares???

For me it was too good!

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Nights are worse...

Nights are worse...

Whole day i can manage..
For sure I can distract myself..
I can make my heart understand...
But when the world sleeps..
And the only company for me are those stars..
I cant wish anything but you by my side..
Nothing else matters then..

Its a lonely night where you are
the only thought..
the only want..
the only obsession..
the only love..

The longing is intolerable..
Tears just cant be stopped..
There comes a moment when i just reach for your hand..
But you are far away..
Distance is difficult..

Only dreams bring you closer..
But sleeping is next to impossible..
Thoughts just don't fade..
I wasn't like this at first..

Baby, the nights are the worst!

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We meet again...

Childish innocence and childhood friends!!!

One has come back to me today...

Those were the days when we were best buddies...

I couldn't imagine my life without her then... I hadn't even thought that there is any wildest possibility that I will leave my school and be separated from her... But my parents had different plans...

Then came goodbyes.. tears.. and lot more tears!

Promises of keeping in touch didn't remain strong enough..

we didnt know or hear anything from each other for 10 whole years...

And then Facebook reunited us.. Thank you facebook!

Today was beautiful... We can be the way we were before... I met her today!!!

These small things are enough to bring the biggest smile on your face.. :D

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Why??

Why does my heart ache tonight?

Why do I shed tears?

Why is every thought yours?

Why am I whispering your name?

Why do I have to listen to your voice everyday?

Why is their a void, when I don't?

Why is everything incomplete without you?

Why cant I just be.....?

Why am I so miserable?

Why is there this anger?

Why is there this fear?

Why are you not with me now?

Why do I love you so much, it makes me cry?

Why do I want to say so much, but I dont say at all?

Why have I lost rationality?

Why have I become so vulnerable?

Why cant I be Me... The way I used to be?

Why am I in love?

*** No offence to people in love..Including me..!! ;)

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That Memorable Evening...

Evening...

Warmth of my sweater

Warmth of your arms

Warmth in your eyes

Warmth of your breathe

Dark evening

Dark sky

Dark trees

Dark secrets in your eyes

Bright stars

Bright lights far away

Bright smile on your face

Bright moon I watch, lying down in your arms

Silent words

Silent confessions

Silent desires

In this silence yours eyes said it all...

And there was not so silent beating of two hearts!

That memorable evening...

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The Second Last Wait...

8th Standard… 14 yrs old… the obsession began!!!

The crazy world of magic… of friendship… of risks… of values!

The land I lived in then & continue to live even now…

The world J.K.Rowling created...

The world of witchcraft and wizardy…

The world of Harry Potter…

I can never be thankful enough!

Those days began with the book in my hand. I would not part with it wherever I went…

In the school bus… In the short break… During the lectures, hiding under the desks.

Then during the lunch break… all the way till the end of the school… While on the bus

returning again!!!

Classes I attented… But when home again… It was behind the geography text book, the only

study book enough to hide the big, fat Potter novel!!! ;)

The days passed in mad haze…

Finishing the first book…

Waiting to lay hands on the next one…

The curiosity of what happens next, used to kill..

Then came Harry on Big screen.

Though it was no match to the descriptive novels…

They did what they could do the best!

The words put into action and images painted my imaginations as well.

Could I ask for anything more!

The release of book…

The release of movie…

The release of book…

The release of movie…

The release of book…

Booked the last part of the series… The Deathly Hallows…

The scene looked like this…

Waking up early in the morning.. as early as 4!!!

Walking all the way to the other side of the town…

Finally the sacred book being in my very own hands…

Starting the read at 5…

Few pages.. and Hedgewig dies…

Crying my eyes out at 7 in the morning!

Not parting with it for the whole day…

By the break of another dawn, I knew…

The Boy Who Lived wins…. He Survives…

The joy that washes over me…

Then leaves a grueling pain…

The feeling of “what I should wait for next?”…

The story is told…

The mystery is solved!

Then comes the flickering hope…

Three parts of the movie still remains…

Reading the books all over again…

Brushing up on the one before the release…

So I just closed the copy of Deathly Hallows…

Just before the release…

The first half of the last to come…

Harry Potter will always reign…

But this is just the SECOND LAST WAIT.

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That's When I Miss You Baby...

You asked me..

Didn't I miss you?

And I wondered...

How should I tell you!

When I look at that moon shine so bright,

I miss you by my side...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When the morning sun rays touch my face,

I think of your warm embrace...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When I feel that whisperinf breeze,

Its like your breathe in my ears.. And I freeze...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When it rains and few drops meet my lips,

Oh honey... How it reminds me of your kiss!

And thats when I miss you baby.

When the stars twinkle in the night sky,

It reminds me of your lovable naughty eyes...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When am walking all alone,

And I know your heart is my destiny, my home...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When I look at my own reflection in the mirror,

I wish I knew what was that thing that made you fall for me, my dear...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When everything is silent and it kills,

with your memories and words my heart fills...

And thats when I miss you baby.

When with the crowd I laugh and play,

But I know its only you who is forever here to stay...

And thats when I miss you baby.

My every breathe is a sigh for you...

My every heart beat calls out your name...

So now you know,

I live every moment of my life...

And thats when I miss you baby.

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